Sudden love
by runningformiles
Summary: Lydia Davis realizes she's in love with someone she never expected to be: her best friend. (Lydia x Victoria)
1. Revelation

Lydia looked at her best friend from across the Grayson Manor's hall. She wanted to cry, but the room was too crowded and, of course, this is not something you do before the Hampton's high society. Therefore, she made her way upstairs to Victoria's bedroom, a place she knew she was welcome in.

After closing the door, she sat on the bed, burying her face in her palms. Lydia sobbed, without holding herself back, relieved that no one else was around. All the feelings she'd been ignoring for the past few months had come rushing with an unstoppable force that afternoon, when she saw Victoria starring at the Van Gough she gifted her with.

It seemed like such a banal scenario. Victoria, at home, looking at a piece of art with her, something that always happened. But the spark in her eyes on that particular day made Lydia's heart beat faster. Her palms started sweating and her face turned red.

-Are you ok? You seem nervous, Lydia? – Victoria said as she held her arms. The touch made her shiver.

-I'm fine. – pulling her arm back, she smiled, trying to hide the obvious confusion she felt inside. – I'm just so glad to see you…I missed you so much during the trip. – she had traveled for a month with her, soon to be, ex-husband.

-Oh… I missed you too… - Victoria put her arms around her pulling for a tight hug. Feeling her warmth against her skin, Lydia couldn't even breathe.

Now, siting on her bed, all she did was question herself. "How could this happen to me? It doesn't make sense… How did I not see it coming?" she cried "I… I love her…"

The door burst open just as she was ready to wash her face in the bathroom and go back to the party, acting like nothing had ever changed. She turned to see who was there, but had no time to hide the evidences of sadness all over her face. The redness of her eyes and cheeks, and the wet marks over them made Victoria stop in her movement to come inside.

-Lydia… What the hell happened? I looked for you everywhere! – She ran towards her friend and held her close. She couldn't respond though. Her arms hanged beside her, unresponsive to Victoria's gesture. – Please say something. I'm worried about you. –she held her face in her palms, tenderly.

Without knowing what to do or say, Lydia stared at the ground, unable to meet the brown eyes that made her feel safe.

-I…Can't say…I don't know… -She tried to set herself loose from her friends embrace, but Victoria didn't let her. Holding her arms, she lowered her head in order to meet her green eyes.

-Don't hide things from me. You know there isn't a thing in the world you can't tell me! –kindly, she pulled her chin up and Lydia could almost feel her breath inside her mouth.

-I love you, Victoria… - She said, aware her friend wouldn't understand it the way she meant to say it. She rested her head on her shoulder.

-I… I love you too Lydia. Now, can you please tell me what's going on?

-That's not what I meant… - She raised her head to face the brunette. Boldly, she pulled her head closer and their lips collided. –I…I love you…

-Oh… - Victoria couldn't move.

-I'm sorry… -Lydia said before running out of the bedroom, leaving her best friend behind with her heart on her throat.

Back in her beach house, hours later, Lydia struggled to sleep, wondering if she had destroyed the most important relationship in her life. The blonde was done crying that day. There were no more tears left.

A noise on the corridor startled her and she sat on the bed. The door opened wide, revealing her night intruder.

-Victoria! – her heartbeats were so loud, she feared her friend could hear them. –What are you doing here?

The brunette sat beside her.

-Lydia… I don't really understand why I'm here. But, you are the person I trust most in my life and I just… - she held her hand – need to say…you don't have to be sorry for what happened today… -Lydia's lips trembled. She couldn't believe her ears. –Because, I'm not sorry you did that.

Standing inches from her face, Victoria pulled in for a kiss. Passionately, their tongues intertwined with each other. Grasping for air, Lydia parted starring at her face. Even in the dark, she knew she was smiling.

-I don't understand what is happening either, Victoria… I never felt anything like this for a… woman before. The only clarity that I have is the understanding that I love you.

-Then, let's not worry about it. The only thing I was sure of the whole night today was that I wished your lips hadn't parted from mine. –she looked down. –I really don't know what this all means…

-Please, sleep here tonight? – the words slipped out of her mouth before she could think.

-Yes. –she whispered. – I wouldn't like to do anything else…


	2. Enough is enough

**I hope you all like this! I wrote this with a lot of love in my heart! for the ones who like to listen to music while you read, I suggest listening to Give it all by Foals, cause it's what I listened to when I wrote it, so that's kind of the whole vibe of the chapter**

A cool breeze blew through the window of Lydia's bedroom. The cold air woke her up. Groggy, she sat on the bed looking for her heated blanket. The sight of Victoria's figure sleeping beside her dissipated the sleepiness from her mind. Wrapped under her recently found covers, she watched her chest rising with her every breath.

Resting her head on her knees, the blonde thought she could stay in that moment for the rest of her life. She felt safe. Judging by the light outside, it was probably before 6 am. The first rays of sunshine were coming up and slowly the air was turning hotter. It would be a beautiful sunny day.

Lost in thought, she just starred at this beautiful scenario happening at the beach.

-Morning… -Victoria spoke and, even though she didn't turn around, Lydia could her a smile in her voice.

-Hi. –she whispered. They starred at each other, not daring too say another word. They both feared anything could break the peace around them.

Victoria rose, sitting beside her best friend, leaning her head on her shoulder. That simple gesture made Lydia's heart melt, but that was, shortly after, followed by a tension on her shoulders as she wondered what was happening with her life. Victoria, also lost in thought, asked herself what was she doing in her best friend's bed.

-Lydia… - The blonde held her breath, preparing herself for a serious conversation about things she wasn't ready to talk about and didn't understand yet.

-Yes…-her voice barely making a sound.

-I'm hungry. –Relieved, she laughed out brunette smiled,understanding why. "She's in love with me…" Just by looking at her green eyes, she imagined what kind of emotional hell she was going through in her mind. If she was already confused about what she felt after one kiss, she figured Lydia's mess was far worse.

At the kitchen table they discussed the new art exhibition at their favorite museum. Distracted, they didn't even notice time pass by. It was almost nine o'clock when Victoria rose from her chair.

-I should go… The kids are probably waking up by now. – Lydia nodded in comprehension.

-And Conrad, of course…-she looked down, noticing a sting of jealousy in her own soul. She thought it was funny how much one can feel and not even be aware. "The human soul is far more complicated than we think…"

-No, he's traveling. Again. – Victoria's lips formed a thin line. For a moment, Lydia thought she saw them tremble. It wasn't news to anyone that he cheated on her. Everyone in the Hampton's new it. Maybe, even she new it, but seemed to neglect it. Instinctively, the golden haired woman got up and held her face in her hands.

-Victoria, I'm so sorry… -tears rolled down the brunette's soft, white cheeks and she let her forehead touch her friend's.

-Let's not talk about this, please.

-Ok. – she wrapped her arms around her. Afraid of the response, she didn't ask when she'd be seeing her again. Maybe this wouldn't go any further. Maybe they would just remain as they were before she declared her love and kissed her. Maybe Victoria would feel weird after coming back home and would never want to see her again. Maybe this was goodbye.

Unexpectedly, Victoria gave her a smooch, interrupting the cascade of terrible thoughts that were rushing through Lydia's brain.

-I'll see you at the fundraiser tonight? –the dark haired woman smiled and headed to the door.

-Yes! –the blonde mumbled, feeling her cheeks burn red. The front door closed and she was left alone in her living room solemnly illuminated by the sun coming through the porch. Her heart beat a thousand miles a second and she felt tingles from head to toe.

Throwing herself on the couch, she laid there staring at the sealing, unaware of the gigantic smile decorating her features. Even though she did not understand the path her life was taking, on that moment, she didn't care.

Outside, Victoria walked towards the manor.

-What the hell am I doing? –wondering, she stared at the ocean. After closing her eyes, she remembered the kiss she gave Lydia just before leaving. "Why did I do that?" her heart filled with anxiety, but as she looked back at the beach house, it calmed. Whatever the reason was, she was happy she did it and wouldn't let anything take that away from her. It wouldn't matter the doubts stirring in her mind or whatever way this "thing" with her best friend would go. She was done with the loneliness. And especially done with the self-reprehension.

For too long she endured her own conscience accusing her of all the terrible things she did in the past. She was too accustomed to inflicting guilt and torturing herself for everything. Now, her husband was, almost certainly, cheating on her, leaving her alone all the time. But, suddenly, one of the people she loves most in the world kisses her and it feels amazing, like she's not all alone afterall. Someone was still capable of loving her. She's not letting that go. Enough was enough.

"It's time to cut out the chains." Victoria decided. No more guilt from now on. No more oppression.

Once again, someone was feeling something for the first time that morning in the Hamptons. Victoria felt hope.

 **Hey! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please comment so I keep motivated to write it** **Your feedback is very important to me!**


	3. Facing herself

_**Hi! I'm sorry it took me so long to update... I promise I'm trying to write more these days. Work and studies consumed all my time these last few months, but I intend to come back here more often.**_

 _ **I know this is a short one, but actually, it was just a part of a massive one that i decided to devide into parts so it isn't too much and i can leave you guys with something! Anyway, expect a rise in drama for the next ones ;)**_

 _ **I hope you like it!**_

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After hours of preparation, Lydia was finally ready to head to the manor for the fundraiser. She chose her favorite blue dress. It was an Ellie Saab, slightly transparent, with a gap that showed a big part of her recently tanned leg. Being part of the Hampton's elite had it's benefits.

She looked at herself in the mirror and smiled, feeling butterflies in her stomach. Her heart beat fast with excitement at the expectation of seeing Victoria again.

Grabbing her golden clutch, she made her way to the door, but stopped, tensing up. "Where am I going with this? What are we doing?" she questioned, afraid of her own feelings. This was something that had been frequent since she separated from her husband. Just before going out to do something new or exciting, she'd feel anxious and, occasionally, even nauseous and her pressure dropped, making her feel like she'd faint.

For a second, she considered giving it all up, staying home and stop whatever this "thing" was with Victoria. She sat on the living room couch and closed her eyes, exhaling deeply. Her hands were shaky and she could feel drops of sweat dripping on her forehead. Tears filled her eyes and, even though, she refused to let them out, they made their way across her cheeks. In this moment, Lydia realized how hard it is to learn how to be free, after so many years of being condescending with living unhappy. Not only she was trying, for the first time, after all the years she spent with her husband, to be with someone else, but she was trying to be with a woman. Maybe it was too much for her.

Maybe she needed some time alone, to think things through and decide what step she wanted to take. The problem was that she already knew what she wanted: Victoria. No matter how much she wanted a break from all the divorce drama, she couldn't afford one. Sometimes you just have to make a move forward.

Back when she was still married, there were nights when she woke up at dawn and wondered if she would do anything different with her life, and all she could see in the future was that man. At this moment, with the divorce on the horizon, she saw nothing. Now, he was no longer the love of her life. Lydia was not used to imagining another scenario and that scared her to her core. All the plans she'd ever made with him were off the table and she had a new responsibility with herself: living.

When they started separating, she, sometimes, went to bed wanting to sleep and not wake up anymore, because she was too afraid of what the next day would bring her. She feared she wouldn't be strong enough alone and she had no north. Life itself was crushing for her.

But she got sick of it. She'd had enough of being afraid. It was time to move on, face life head on and chase her happiness, wherever it may rest. Even if she was scared of all the new feelings flowing in her soul, she'd keep going. Determined to create a new life for herself, she stood up, in a rush of courage.

Looking at a picture of her and Victoria at the table beside her, she smiled. There was a good reason to get out of the house tonight.


	4. Breaking point

On the master suit, Victoria was fully clothed and with her make up on point, but she couldn't make herself come out to join the first gests, who were being welcomed by the staff. Always accustomed to being in control of everything, Victoria wasn't used to not knowing what could happen next. As much as she was excited about seeing Lydia, she was afraid too.

She felt an overwhelming weight on her chest. There were moments she wished life came with a manual. Other times, she had the feeling that everybody else around her had a copy of it, but she just didn't get one.

Anyway, she thought, she was the Hampton's queen no matter what and wouldn't stand there as a victim of her own choices. Victoria lifted from her chair and got out of her bedroom. She'd hang on to that hope she felt that afternoon.

A half hour later, she had already socialized with some guests and was starting to feel a bit more relaxed. The front door opened, revealing her best friend. She took a step back at the sight of Lydia. She'd never seen her more beautiful.

-Lydia! –she smiled widely, heading to her, ready for a hug. –You are breathtaking! - The blonde laughed and held her tight, closing her eyes.

" _Finally…"_ Victoria's perfume was so sweet and the hug made Lydia feel like it'd been worth facing her earlier anxiety.

-Thank you! And you are no different, Victoria… - she stared at her, with her cheeks red, as she couldn't hide her obvious attraction to the figure standing in front of her. The brunette was wearing a long black dress, with lace over the legs by Monique Lhuillier.

They stared at each other without knowing what to do or say next, but glad to be together. A guest interrupted their moment, greeting them both and, for the next hour that's how the evening resumed. They met everyone with friendly comments, never leaving one another's side.

Having Lydia with her made barring all the pretentious and two-faced people possible and even fun. They made sarcastic jokes when they left, after making the most obviously adulating comments to her.

After getting sick of meeting everyone, they stopped by the Manor's bar and got drinks. Lydia felt like nothing had changed since that morning and Victoria was relieved, thinking about how much she had worried for nothing. Wanting to be alone, they made their way to the master suite, careful not to be seen leaving the event together. Victoria wouldn't have much time to spend with her due to all her responsibilities in the fundraiser.

Arriving in the room, they laid on the bed starring at the ceiling, laughing. Lydia was telling her all the recent gossip about the Hampton's socialites. Closing her eyes, the blonde slid her hand to the side of the bed, touching Victoria's slightly. The brunette held her friends hand tight and closed her eyes, exhaling. They both felt peaceful.

A bip on Victoria's phone broke the silence. She sat down and grabbed it. There was a message with a photo attached. She opened it.

-Oh god… - she covered her eyes with her hands. She felt all the blood in her body rush to her face and tears filled her eyes. There it was, the proof of a truth she'd avoided for a long time. In the picture, Conrad shared a bed with another woman. Another message arrived with a new one of him with a different woman.

Victoria had hired a private detective to find out if Conrad really was on business trips. She felt like the most stupid woman alive. Lydia sat beside her asking what was wrong and she couldn't even formulate words to respond.

The phone biped once more, but this time with a message from Conrad: " _I'm coming tonight. I miss you."_

She left the phone over the bed, unblocked and ran to the bathroom locking the door. Lydia watched her speechless, worried about what she'd received. When she closed the door, she reached to her phone and saw everything. "Shit…"

Victoria's head spin and she sat on the floor burying her face on her knees. It was almost eleven o'clock. He'd be at the manor at any moment. She could no longer hold back her cry. It was all too much. Lydia could hear her sobbing through the door. She went there and knocked.

-Victoria, please let me in! Let me help you! – the brunette didn't respond. Lydia imagined she wanted to be alone, but she didn't know what to do and didn't want to leave her that way. As much as she wanted Victoria to be with her, she understood what she was feeling because of her husband and didn't resent her for that. She wouldn't give up on trying to help. – Victoria! Please open!

The door opened a little, but Lydia couldn't see Victoria. She had opened it from the floor. She looked up at her with a red face and wet cheeks. She kneeled beside her and put her amrs around her . No words could be said to console her.

-Lydia…I need to deal with this tonight… I need to be alone now. –She said, her tone, suddenly, harsh. The blonde loosened her embrace and looked at her concerned.

-I'll be here if you need me. –She got up and left the room. A feeling of anger rose in her heart. She didn't understand it though. Arriving once again to the main hall, she grabbed a drink from a waiter passing by. She needed it to calm down.

Victoria stopped crying, but stayed on the floor, starring at the mirror in her bathroom. She could see the door and expected Conrad to knock on it at any time. In an intense wave of anger, she got up, washed her face and went back to the bedroom. Sitting by her bed, she held her phone, waiting for him.

Downstairs, Lydia was on her third glass and loosing count. Her fingertips felt slightly numb, but her rage had subsided. Her vision was blurry, but she felt glad to be in that state. She finished the glass of champagne and, a few moments later, she found herself in the private Grayson bar, in another room, outside of the party. She served herself a full glass of scotch and sat on the chair. She didn't even know why she was getting drunk.

Conrad opened the door to the manor, tired from his trip. He greeted a few people and, after realizing Victoria wasn't at the salon he went to her suite. He figured she took a minute to herself.

He found her sitting by the bed with her back turned to the door. She didn't turn to him when he came in and said hello and that he missed her.

-Victoria, are you ok? –he walked in front of her, trying to see her face.

-No, Conrad. I'm not. – her voice came out lower than she expected. There was so much rage inside of her that she expected to explode when he finally arrived, but, surprisingly, the words came out calmly from her mouth. She got up, facing him.

She could smell a new perfume he'd never used before. A slight tan on his cheeks suggested he went to a beach or maybe stayed by a pool the last few days. His expression, that seemed to be relaxed from his days away, quickly turned into a concerned one as he noticed her stare.

-What's wro…

-You don't get to talk now, Conrad. – The brunette hissed. – You know well what is going on. Don't lie to me! –the words started jumping out of her mouth faster and faster. – You do not get to come home after what you've been doing to me and act like nothing happened! You don't get to come in here and treat me like a fool!

-What, on earth, are you talking abou-

She reached for the phone over the bed.

-This. –She showed him all the pictures. He kept quiet, not knowing how to respond. His face burned, ashamed. There was nothing that could be said that could make this right. If it had been only one picture, he could've said it had been a mistake, but more than one, he had no way out. –What's the matter, sweetheart? –she spit the last word. –Cat caught your tongue?

-This is not what it looks like. – he managed to say with a dry throat, but he knew instantly he said the wrong thing. He felt awful, looking at her red eyes. Victoria laughed, furious.

-I can not believe this is what you're trying to pull on me! How stupid do you think I am, Conrad? –she sat down. –But I am... How could I not see this? I'm probably the last one who knows… I feel like the biggest idiot alive.

-Don't do this to yourself. You don't deserve this, Victoria.

-You're damn right I don't deserve this! I trusted you! – she yelled, pointing her finger at his chest– Some friends tried to alert me about this and I thought they were wrong, because I thought you loved me.–she threw her hands in the air, as if giving up.

-I do love you, Victoria. –he tried.

-Bullshit! Don't give me that! I don't believe a single word that comes out of your mouth anymore! –she went to the balcony, desperate for air. Connrad chased her.

-It's true Victoria. –he looked down. –I may have done this to you, but you have to believe me that it's not because I don't love you. –his eyes pleaded for her to listen to his words.

-Conrad… – she turned to face him. –At this moment, I couldn't care less if you love me. –the wind came from the beach and threw her hair on her face, but she didn't even mind. Putting it back behind her year, she made a decision. –What I want is to be away from you. We are done.

Sighing in relief, Victoria went back inside and poured herself a glass of whiskey. He was speechless. His heart ached in a way he'd never felt before. She couldn't leave him. He wouldn't accept this without a fight.

-You can't do this! Just because I had affairs, you want to give up on everything we have built? What about Daniel? –he took a step forward. –Have you given a second thought to what this could do to your son?

-Oh, please, Conrad! Of course I care about Daniel! You act like I'm completely heartless, but you are you're the one, who's been cheating on me and sabotaging this relationship! And it's not just that! –she put her glass down. – I've been putting up with your insane jealousy for far too long. I'm sick of feeling like you own me. –she walked to the door. –I'm tired of feeling trapped in this marriage, Conrad. I can't do this anymore. –she put her hand on the doorknob, ready to leave.

-So, what is your plan? To leave me, get a job and support yourself? – Conrad laughed. –Because we both know you can not live without all of this. –he looked around, referring to all the luxury he believed to provide her.

She turned her head to him. She thought about that morning at Lydia's kitchen. As much as she was worried about what he was saying, knowing that she was there gave her courage to, finally, change her life.

-What I will do, once you and I are divorced, is entirely my business. Not yours.

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 _ **I hope you are all enjoying this story! Please leave comments letting me know what you thik of it :)**_


	5. Colateral damage

Stumbling and accidentally hitting other guests, Lydia made her way to the main door at the Grayson Manor hall. She was dying to get back home and sleep.

Just before holding the doorknob, she felt a familiar pair of hands holding her arms.

-Lydia? Are you ok? –The brunette asked with worried eyes.

-Why do you care? –she responded with a drawled voice. - Just let me go home… -Victoria took a step back, surprised by her response and the way she looked.

-What… you are completely drunk! I'm not going to let you leave here alone! I'll take you! –she said, opening the door, looking around, hoping no one else was seeing her best friend in that dreadful state.

The blonde didn't say a word. She just tried, without success, to walk faster and avoid Victoria, who chased after her, increasing her pace. They walked to the cold outside air, the ocean breeze blew their hairs and dresses.

-Why are you being like this? – she used her shoulders to support her friend, who was in no to walk home.

-Can you please just stop… pretending… like you actually care about me? - Victoria shook her head in disbelief, not understanding what was going on. –I'll be fine from here! –the blonde set herself loose and went towards her doorsteps. - Just leave me alone now.

-No! Lydia, what, on earth are you talking about? Why do you think I don't care about you? That's nonsense! –Victoria walked after her.

-Bullshit, Victoria… -she laughed- You don't give a shit about me! –the blonde turned to her serious. – You know, I'm not here to be used. I'm glad I realized you were just using me to get back at Conrad before I went in to deep in this… whatever this is.

Victoria was shocked. She not only felt offended, but also hurt by her words.

\- Is that what you honestly think? Of course I wouldn't do that too you! How can you say that? – she whispered, her eyes turning red and wet. –If I'm that manipulative, if I'm that heartless and cold, why am I here chasing after you? And why would I chose my best friend for some petty revenge? Why would I chose the most important relationship that I have just to get back at Conrad? Why would I put that at risk? Huh?

Lydia was quiet. Victoria had a point. She felt the blood rush to her cheeks, ashamed, but couldn't find any words to say. Her insecurities had taken over her and she ended up assuming the worst possibility about what was happening between the two of them. She had been so afraid of this new relationship that her own mind decided to sabotage it, before it could do any further harm.

After no response, Victoria went on.

-And, you know what? I looked for you all night and couldn't find you! I had the biggest fight of my life with Conrad and all I wanted was to see you! –suddenly, she stopped, felling completely drained by all the emotional turmoil she faced the whole day. –Just… Come talk to me when you are rational, because I really can't do this right now. This is too much for me.–she turned to leave.

Lydia stood quiet on the porch deciding if she should go after her or not. Because even if what they had was real, maybe it would be better to just avoid all the complications and hurt it could bring. But, if she let her go, she would, probably never have her back, and that was a thought Lydia couldn't even consider. She had to face her fears. Running away from getting hurt doesn't make life worth living.

-Victoria! Wait! –she tried to run towards her. The brunette was halfway between the two houses and stopped, looking back. Lydia could clearly see the wet marks on her cheeks and she regretted the way she acted that evening. In her state of inebriation, she stumbled and, before she could stand up straight, she bumped right on to her, almost making them both fall. Feeling even more embarrassed, the blonde put her arms around her and held her tight. –I'm sorry… I'm so sorry. –She cried.

Victoria felt relief. She almost thought it was all over between them. She understood that Lydia didn't really mean those things and that she said them in a moment of complete weakness. Also, she knew everything Lydia was going through. She forgave her and hugged her back, just glad that they weren't fighting anymore. They stood in that embrace for a long moment, without speaking.

-I think I just ended my marriage. –Victoria said, facing her.

-I'm here for you.

-I know. I'm here for you too, I know you're going through a lot. We are going to get through all of this together.

Hand in hand, they made their way to the beach house. Before opening the door, they stopped, facing each other. The golden haired woman grabbed Victoria's cheeks and kissed her. The night didn't end so bad after all.

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 **I hope you liked this :) let me know what you think of this chapter!**


	6. Fears

_**Heeey**_ _ **Glad to be back with one more chapter for all of you to enjoy! I have one little note that I would like to make, before you read this: there was no David Clarke affair in this story. Victoria never cheated. (besides with Lydia lol). Anyway, this one came out really long and was a very emotional chapter for me to write and I hope you all like it and, please review, because this one means a lot to me…**_

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Lydia woke up just before the sunrise. She felt a slight headache from all the drinking the night before. She turned to the side to get an aspirin on the night stand, but stopped. Victoria was sleeping beside her. She thought it was weird, because she recalled her leaving the night before. Even weirder, she was wearing a nightgown, not the party dress, and there was a suitcase by the bed on her side.

After getting up and taking her medicine, she covered her with the sheets. No matter the reason for all that, she'd wait until she woke up to ask.

-Good morning! – the blond said as she opened her eyes and saw Victoria awake, lying next to her. – What a nice surprise…

-Morning! – she smiled, before realizing Lydia had no idea why she was there – I need to explain all this! –she hurried, siting up, before Lydia could say anything else. – I would like to ask you if I could stay with you for a while… Last night, after I brought you home, I got back to the manor and I just couldn't stand being there anymore. I just wanted all the guests to leave, so I could run from there! I can't stand to be under the same roof as Conrad! He wouldn't accept going to the south fork in and-

-Victoria. – Lydia raised her hand stopping her. –Its ok. You don't need to talk me into this. I would love having you here. Besides… Anything to make up for the big embarrassment of last night. I'm so sorry about that. –she looked down, ashamed.

-Don't worry about it! –The brunette approached her, laying down again. They laid face-to-face, standing inches from each other. – That's in the past. And thank you so much for letting me move her for a while. – she caressed the blond's arm and held her hand.

Lydia smiled widely. No words could describe how happy she was that Victoria would be there living with her. It seemed almost like a dream. For the first time, she felt like she could kiss her, without worrying if she couldn't do it or that Victoria would go away and end everything. Her insecurities were finally set aside.

The blonde drew closer to her until their noses touched and, before she expected, Victoria's lips met hers, hungry for her. Never before they'd kissed each other with such intensity. They both felt completely free, without anything holding them back. Victoria remembered the moment she came back to Lydia's house the night before. When she saw her asleep, she felt completely safe, as if everything she was worried about would be fine. In her embrace, she felt a warmth her heart had longed for years, since she drew further apart from Conrad. Lydia had always been there for her, always supporting her through everything. On this moment, all the gratitude and tenderness she had for her, made her want to kiss her more.

Even though she did not understand where those feelings came from, then, she didn't care. Lydia was surprised at Victoria's attitude and couldn't help, but want more. Surrendering to her desire, she pulled Victoria on top of her and grabbed her hair on the back of her neck, as their mouths didn't part from each other.

Neither of them had ever experienced this sort of interaction with a woman before and they felt more excited at every second that passed.

As Lydia's hands traveled down alongside Victoria's body, the air became electric. Nothing else in the world seemed to exist but them. Until they heard a loud knock on the front door.

They stopped frozen. For a brief moment, Victoria wondered if the door was unlocked and if it was possible that someone would catch them in the act. She stood up nervous.

-Who do you think it is? –Lydia, sensing her nervousness, rose from the bed, straightening her clothes.

-I don't know. Stay here. –she put on a robe and made her way downstairs. She felt scared, as if whoever was knocking knew that Victoria was there and would find out what they were doing. Even though, she knew it was an irrational fear, because no one would get to that conclusion, based solemnly on that. They were definitely not ready to let anybody else know about them.

The knocks were still, insistently, loud on the door. With shaky hands, Lydia opened it.

-Lydia! I'm sorry to disturb you like this so early in the morning. I didn't know who else to recur to. – Conrad Grayson came inside, uninvited.

-W… What's wrong? –she turned to him, pretending to be completely oblivious to the situation of his relationship with Victoria.

-Please, tell me you know where Victoria is! We had a huge argument last night. I thought we could work things out today, but she isn't home…She isn't at the South Fork Inn or anywhere for that matter! She doesn't return my calls!–his voice was desperate and angry, as if he felt betrayed somehow. He walked nervously from side to side. –So I thought maybe she would be here or you'd know.

-I'm sorry, Conrad… I… I haven't seen her since last night!

-I can't believe this is happening… -he put his hand on his forehead, worried. He stopped walking and faced Lydia, his expression showing he was ready to tell her a secret. –She wants to leave me, Lydia.

-I… -she gasped. –I'm so sorry about that, Conrad! –she faked surprise. She felt awful for lying to him, even though he had been horrible to Victoria. A sting of guilt walled up in her heart. She'd been ignoring the fact that she was in love with a married woman and now her husband was in front of her, wondering where the hell she was. And she was on her bed. –What happened?

-I honestly don't know… -he lied, typically. Lydia never expected an honest answer when she asked that question. – I think she might be with somebody else. – He stated, serious. –She was too determined to end things with me… I don't understand this… It's the only explanation I can think of.

Lydia stood still, feeling trapped.

-I… don't know what to say, Conrad… I don't think she would do something like this…- but she was and it was with her. And she was listening to the whole conversation from the top of the stairs, secretly.

-I just need to talk to her! Can you, please, call her? –his pleading eyes made her heart ache.

-Of course. –she grabbed her phone and dialed Victoria's number. Logically, she ignored the call.-She's not answering, Conrad… Maybe she just went shopping to try to clear her mind. –she tried.

-You're probably right. I don't know why I'm so on the edge!

-Would you like a glass of water? –she offered, even if she desperately wanted him to leave. Her guilt spoke higher. He ignored her, continuing.

-You don't think she might be with someone else, Lydia? –She had to control herself not to shiver. –Isn't there any man, any name, she has mentioned to you?

-Conrad, there isn't anyone else… I highly doubt Victoria would do something like this. Just calm yourself and wait, she'll turn up soon. – she led him to the door.

-You're probably right. –he said, following her to the door. But, still, his insane jealousy would never leave him at ease. –Thank you. Please call me if you hear from her.

-Ok. I will. –she shut the door behind him and leaned on it, shutting her eyes.

-Oh god… Oh god… -she whispered repeatedly to herself, as anxiety grew bigger, compressing her chest. She held her hair, taking deep breaths trying to get calmer. She didn't even notice when Victoria entered the room and was startled when she felt the touch of her hand on her shoulder. –God!

\- Are you ok? –the brunette said, seeing how bad she was. –I'm so sorry you had to go through this. –She put her arms around her tightly. Lydia pulled back, setting herself loose from her embrace. Victoria took a step back, surprised at her reaction.

–I'm not ok… -she felt breathless. - I had no idea what to say to him! It was awful lying like that to his face! How could we do this? I mean, we know he's cheated too, but…

-He doesn't deserve your compassion, Lydia. Don't forget the man Conrad is. –Lydia's fears and anxieties came rushing with full strength and all she could feel was guilt, mascaraing each one of them. It was the perfect excuse her subconscious created to get her out of this path she was too afraid to face.

-We can't do this, Victoria. It's not right.

-I… - Victoria's startled expression, suddenly, turned into an angry one. She knew what her best friend was really feeling. They had know each other for too long to be fooled. -Well, Lydia, you put yourself into this the moment you decided to kiss me! Did you forget that I was married? Why don't you admit that you guilt is not what is stopping you? Why don't you admit that you're scared, because since you started separating from Michael, you've been feeling completely disoriented, not really knowing how to live your life for yourself? Admit that, even though you feel bad about me cheating on Conrad with you, this is not what is making you want to give up on what we have. –seeing her surprised expression, she went on. –Yeah, I know you! Sometimes, I think I know you better than you know yourself!

The blond couldn't respond. Her cheeks turned red and her eyes filled up with tears. She was right about everything, but still, her words hurt, because she didn't want to admit any of this. She was sick of feeling fragile and she was afraid that, if she did, she would lose her strength and will to keep fighting.

-I just need you to go, please.

-Why? –The brunette replied. Her voice turning hoarse. - I'm not going anywhere.

-What are we doing, Victoria?! –the words falling loud out of her mouth, before she could contain them. The last thing she wanted was to fight, but she was falling apart. This was the conversation they'd been avoiding since everything started between them.

-Why do you want to talk about this? –she came closer. -I… - she wanted to say that she didn't know why and that it didn't matter, but she knew it wouldn't be true. She knew that deep down, this "relationship" was too different from everything she'd ever experienced and being with a woman was something entirely new.

She feared what could happen if somebody found out. But the thing she feared most was falling in love with her, because that would mean that, at some point, people would have to know, and she was too scared of that. She didn't want to be scared and she thought she shouldn't, but she was. And, because of that, she needed just to keep going, without wondering about these things. She hoped with all her heart that her courage would, eventually, beat them and that she'd grow careless about them.

-Victoria, we need to know where we are going with thi-

-We really don't, Lydia. –she held her hand, with tears in her eyes. –I care about you. You care about me. It's amazing when we are together and you're my best friend. When I'm with you… -her lips trembled, as tear rolled down her cheek. –I feel safe. –she whispered. – And that is all I want. I don't want to care about the rest! I don't want to think about the consequences. For the first time in my life, I don't want to know what is going to happen.

Lydia's heart felt calmer, hearing those words. She hugged her tightly, letting her cry. She was perfectly aware of how much strength Victoria had to pull to let go of wanting control. This wasn't something natural, let alone, easy for her. Besides, when she heard how much she actually felt for her, all her tension seemed to have faded. She smiled, aware that she wasn't as lonely as she thought she was.

-You're right. We've spent too much time in our lives miserable, putting our own will aside for so many different reasons… We need to be happy now. I want to be with you. –she lifted the brunette's chin up and kissed her. - Nothing else matters.


	7. Bliss

**This is a very, very, very happy chapter. I promise.**

* * *

-Do you have any idea how happy I am when I'm with you? –the blonde asked, smiling. Victoria snuggled closer to her on the bed. Their lips collided softly and hungry for each other.

-After I fought with Conrad last night I couldn't think of anything else but you. I needed you, Lydia. I knew that the moment I hugged you all the madness and chaos in my mind would disappear. –a tear rolled down her cheek. Lydia wiped it off. –I… I just want to thank you, because I don't know where I would be if you weren't here for me. –the brunette buried her face in her neck, without mind all the hair in her face. Feeling her perfume was like a dream.

-I'm always here for you. – Lydia whispered, wrapping her arms around her, pulling her close. She imagined the tighter she hugged her, the more she expelled all the sadness off her tiny body.

Not a single thought crossed Victoria's mind in that moment. That's when she finally felt peace. She was exactly where she needed to be. She inhaled deeply, feeling a mix of the smell of lydia's hair and the scent of the salty ocean air that blew in from the window. In that second, she realized there was nothing more in that world that she wanted to do besides being with her right then and there.

As if a spark of light had shone in the end of a tunnel, a breakthrough happened in her soul, when she realized her happiness had to come first. For years she'd let herself come after the needs of her husband and son. She hadn't been living her life, but theirs. It was time to stop.

But how? How would she break the chains between Conrad and her? How would she set herself loose from his tyranny and start living a life worth living? She didn't even know how long it would take to divorce him. She didn't even know what to do on that morning. Hell, she had no idea what, on earth, she would have for breakfast.

-A penny for your thoughts. –the greeneyed woman whispered, caressing her arms.

-I just wish life had a manual sometimes… -she laughed, with sad eyes.

-Who doesn't! –they giggled a bit. –We are gonna be fine, Victoria. Somehow, I just know it.

Looking at her eyes, she desperately wanted to believe her, but all her demons seemed to scream and laugh inside her brain that nothing was right and would never be ok. But, for a brief second, the light coming in through the window and shone over Lydia's face and that made her feel a desire for her. It was stronger than anything she'd felt before for her. She just looked so amazingly beautiful.

It was like all the love she had always felt for her best friend had intensified and become something more. All the sentiment she'd had for her since the first time the blonde had kissed her, suddenly grew into a perfectly defined love. Victoria Grayson was in love with a woman.

That's when she was sure it was worth hanging on to hope. She would not give up. She would not allow herself to sink into an ocean of misery. It was time to fight.

Smiling, she kissed her intensely, letting all that she felt flow freely, for the first time in her life. She wanted her. She was ready to make a move and close the gap between their bodies, but the giant roar that her stomach made reminded both of them they needed to eat. Victoria knew she needed waffles for breakfast.

* * *

They made their way downstairs, Lydia served herself a bowl of cereal with milk and Victoria started preparing her own plate.

-I'll wait for you in the living room. –the blond said, going out of the kitchen and sitting on the couch. The light from a beautiful sunny day illuminated the whole room, giving it a happy vibration.

In the kitchen, Victoria finished making her food. Voraciously, she ate it before reaching the door. She was glad no one had been around to see that shameful scene. She laughed at herself alone. She was done with it. Done with trying her best to keep up with everyone else. She would do what she wanted, what felt right to her and only her. If she wanted to stay with Lydia, she would and there was no voice in the world that would convince her that it was wrong to do that. There would be no voice in her own mind telling her not to do that anymore, because she decided to listen to her heart and set it free from it's chains.

She ran out of the kitchen and opened the door, roughly. The blonde jumped on the couch, scared by the loud noise the door made when it hit the wall. She held her bowl, careful not to spill any milk. The brunette, held the doorknob starring at her, smiling widely.

-Hi… -she said.

-Hi… -Lydia said, smiling with her mouth full of cereal. She put the bowl down by the table. –What is it?

-I love you too… -Victoria walked inside, closing the door behind her and set on the couch by Lydia's side. She caressed her friend's arm, feeling her soft skin - I need you…

Lydia stood speechless. Her heart beat a thousand miles a second and she could feel excitement bursting inside of her.

-Oh my god, Victoria… -she swallowed and covered her mouth with her hand. –I'm so happy to hear you say this… -she held her hand. - I love you so much!

They hugged tightly for what seemed like and eternity, never wanting to leave each other's embrace. When, Victoria, finally, let go of her arms, her face stood inches from Lydia's. Their noses touched lightly and their eyes were closed. Their lips brushed for a second, but Victoria, suddenly stepped back.

In that moment, she was completely taken by a profound desire to do more than just kissing her best friend. Even if she didn't know how that would go, she didn't mind and was sure the blonde wouldn't mind it either. For the first time, she felt a sexual desire for a woman as much as she had felt before for a man, so it scared her for a second. But, looking at her green eyes and her beautiful golden hazed face, enlightened by the sun, she felt calm and knew deep in her heart that she could trust her.

She lifted her hand, pulling Lydia's bangs behind her ears and kissed her. There was no hesitation, no holding back. They were pure desire. Lydia pulled Victoria closer, holding her hair on the back of her neck. Victoria moaned, holding her hair as well.

The brunette felt like she was liberating herself from all the years of imprisonment in her own mind and in her marriage, so she just didn't think anymore. All she did was feel and touch more and more. Her hands went down to Lydia's chest and she experienced the sensation of touching someone else's breast that she never felt before. It was all new to Lydia too, so she moaned inside her mouth, as a rush of adrenaline went through her whole body.

Lydia grabbed Victoria by the waist and pulled her to her lap. Putting her legs around her waist, they could feel each other in places they never did before and the sensation was driving them crazy. The blonde lowered her hands, touching Victoria's most sensitive spot, making her moan over and over again, as she teased her, moving her fingers in circles. She was impressed at how much knowing her own body made her aware of how to touch another woman.

The brunette carved her fingernails on her neck, still holding her hair. She bit her lips and started moving her hips back and forth. All she knew was that she wanted Lydia inside of her, somehow. As if she was reading her thoughts, she slid her hands under her dress and inserted her fingers inside.

The sensation of being in Victoria made Lydia feel like she finally had her to herself. The woman she loved was right there, all hers. No one else's.

Victoria slid her hands inside Lydia's shirt, touching her naked breasts, making her moan too. On fire, she made her hands go even lower, touching Lydia's clit. They were both starting to get louder. Opening their eyes, briefly, they starred at one another's expressions, smiling. They kissed, breathless.

Victoria felt her touching all the right spots and as it all became rougher, she knew she was close to climaxing. Tilting her head back, she opened her mouth, allowing every sound to come out unrepressed. She moved her hands between Lydia's legs, making her close to coming.

As Lydia felt Victoria's body trembling over her, in an orgasm, she climaxed herself.

-Oh God… -The brunette whispered, as she collapsed over her on the couch, burying her head on her neck. Breathless, the blonde put her arms around her, laughing.

-I didn't know this would be so good… - Victoria laughed at her comment.

-I feel so safe with you. –she whispered against the blonde's sweaty neck.

Victoria lifted her head to face her. Lydia's forehead touched hers.

-You are safe with me. You will always be. I promise. – she pulled in, pressing her lips against hers. They laid down on the couch, with almost every body part touching each other and slept for hours.

Victoria last thoughts before falling asleep were "I'm free… I'm finally free."


	8. A new beggining

**Hello… Welcome back to Sudden Love! I know some of you might have thought I had abandoned this story, but it was never my intention to do so. I was in an incredibly difficult moment in my life and it made it hard for me to write this story, because it has a deep connection to things that happened to me. But, I've been fighting hard and, now I'm on a calmer period, and feel like I can write again. I hope you all like this and keep enjoying the story.**

-I think we're gay... -Lydia said, abruptly, surprising Victoria, who was on the driver's seat. They were driving back home from the mall after spending the day shopping for shoes. That always seemed to distract Lydia whenever she was down. She'd woken up feeling like she didn't want to do anything that morning and Victoria dragged her out of bed. She wouldn't allow her to succumb to her mind like that. The blonde looked at her waiting for a reply. Victoria laughed.

-Does it matter what we are? – she said, defyingly.

-I don't know, really. I mean, I always thought I was straight and then BAM! This happens, so… - she inhaled deeply. – I guess I just don't want to be confused. Maybe, we're bisexual. – she shrugged.

-Maybe we are… -the brunette kept her eyes on the road. She felt light. With no weight on her shoulders. Her chest moved soothingly with every breath. The last 3 months really had changed her. Lydia and her had been together since and the darkness inside their hearts seemed to diminish a bit every day, as they grew closer. Also, there was a process of liberation happening inside each one. – I, honestly, don't think I care much about what category we fit in. – she held her hand. – What matters to me is us. I'm satisfied just by understanding that I love you and that I am attracted to you.

-I wish I was… -Lydia complained. – I guess the categories were just made for people to give names to feelings and to things they don't really understand.

-Do you feel you understand yourself more if you chose to label yourself as bisexual? – she caressed her hair.

-I guess… But I think it has a heavy load. – she looked down. -It's like, if people knew they would automatically associate a bunch of things to us. Things that have nothing to do with who we are really.

-People do that for no reason already, darling. We need to be strong and not pay attention to the opinions of others. – the blonde nodded, with distant eyes. That always seemed easier to say than to do, but she was right. There was no other way to be at peace. Guessing that she was still apprehensive, Victoria continued – Just live one day at a time, Lydia. What you think about yourself today is what matters.

-You're right. -She smiled. She always managed to give her hope. The time they'd spent together had been an amazing journey of discovery for them. They were exploring desires that were inside them, but had always been kept silent and were finally free to flow. Also, they were finally divorced from their husbands, which brought it's own freedom. New winds were blowing in the Hamptons for those two. Winds of Change. – Thank you, Victoria. – She said, sweetly, with far more emotion than she expected.

Victoria pulled over to the side of the rode and parked the car. She turned to Lydia and grabbed both her hands and pulled them to her lap.

-I'm the one who should be thankful, Lyd. -Victoria had never used that nickname before. The blonde couldn't help but give a big, warm smile at it. -I'm so grateful to you. – the brunette repeated in a whisper.

-I… I don't understand… - she looked for the explanation in her brown eyes that smiled back at her. Victoria put her hair behind her year and shook her head, playfully.

-How can you not? – she giggled. – If you had never been brave enough to tell me you were in love with me, we would never be here… We would never have lived the amazing moments we've been experiencing together. I would, probably, not have had the courage to divorce Conrad. – she admitted. -But now, I'm here, feeling like I can breathe for the first time in years. And that's all because you were courageous, Lydia.

The blonde couldn't speak. She was right. There was an enormous courage inside of her, she hadn't acknowledged. Victoria's words had been like a cool breeze for her. Whatever had been depressing her, couldn't contest what she'd said. Lydia would hang on to that and not let whatever fears she had overshadow the joy she'd conquered.

She lowered her head until it was buried in Victoria's neck and put her arms around her, holding tight.

-Victoria. -She whispered. -I promise to focus on the present and on the good things. I won't let my fears take over me anymore. I want to welcome this change in my life now. – her smile made Victoria's heart warm. – I will choose faith and hope.

They hugged tight and smiled, both proud of one another. Suddenly, Victoria burst out laughing. She didn't really understand why, but Lyd started laughing with her. Tears rolled down their cheeks as if they were emotional at the same time.

Before Lydia could realize, Victoria's hands were on the back of her head, pulling her closer. Their lips parted and collided soft and eager for each other.

It was like the weight of the world had been lifted off their backs and they could finally live again.


End file.
